Monday, August 10, 2009

Eating My Enlightenment

I'm very excited that my otherwise typically "black thumb" has managed to produce these thriving new-- and very green I'll have you know-- Goji berry sprouts. They're two Sundays old which I remember because I planted them during my ritualistic viewing of "True Blood." Appropo of nothing other than confessing a guilty pleasure.

The reason goji berries and superfoods are noteworthy for our purposes is that here in the "Stumbling Free" blog, I'm attempting to broadcast my law of attraction experiment to find the best-feeling thoughts and, well, the best feeling... feelings... I can find. And see what good, if any, is truly manifested in my life. It is "effort," but it is primarily thought and emotional "effort" as opposed to action effort-- and it is the effort to relax. To effort... less. And raw superfoods do seem to be one of the many ways that help my cells sing and feel good. Which helps me find that feeling of relief and letting go.

There is definitely some work involved though, and I haven't always been totally aligned in the past with wanting do all that work. Sometimes it's a bit more of pulling myself up by the proverbial bootstraps than it is drinking unicorn kisses and holding hands and skipping. Sometimes it's less about feeling happy about what I'm doing in the moment while I'm doing the work. And I want to explore that more as this little experiment unfolds-- why sometimes it DOES seem like in certain situations, doing the thing that doesn't quite feel like "turning toward the best feeling thought" and "moving downstream," but rather paddling a little and doing something that doesn't feel so great in the moment, ultimately DOES feel better in the long run. As was in this case when I first started "making" myself create the superfood habit. This forceful "making myself" element seems to go against the idea of doing only what feels inspired and joyful. But in short, I think it's just a bit of digging into some of my negative attachments and habits and tearing out something slightly diseased.

In this case, eating convenient but also processed unhealthy foods (yes, friends and neighbors, vegan food CAN be QUITE unhealthy), in reality, genuinely doesn't feel aligned or "downstream" with my inner-being. But these food habits are such longtime habits with which I've learned to have a sort of emotional-guidance-system... numbness, so much so that the call of Source on this topic which has been ignored for so long, initially because parents or friends or other people told me it was healthy so I ignored what my inner-being told me, that I don't even know I'm doing anything out of alignment. I can't feel it. I've trained myself to ignore the feeling because other people told me to.

And now as I become more sensitive and listen to my emotional guidance a little more closely, and I do finally recognize that I want to move more downstream on a given topic-- like food or health-- I am one of those people who sometimes gets a little graceless and brash with myself. I sometimes don't "turn in the stream" toward what feels good incrementally as much as yank myself around, trying to tear out the old pattern all at once.

To put it in terms my yoga teachers have often used, you never slam your body all the way into the splits the first time you stretch. You'll tear something. But that is my proclivity sometimes.

But with the superfoods, however it's happened, I have found a way to have these be a part of my life and have gotten into a good rhythm with it. Now it's part of what I do and who I am. Literally-- the superfoods are what my body is made of which is just such a cool idea. I just love that.

As far as growing the goji berries, I have zero idea what I'm doing, but it seems to be working so far. Cathy Silvers (remember Jenny Piccolo from "Happy Days"? Same person) has a company that sells these raw dehydrated Himalayan Goji berries that I buy at Erewhon here in Los Angeles. I like these or David Wolfe's Sunfood brand best of all the ones I've tried. I find them to be softer and fresher. And in keeping with the law of attraction theme of this blog and listening to my emotional guidance system, they just "feel" better to me. No disrespect to any of the other great companies out there.

Anyway, I split open a bunch of the goji berries, simply exposing the seeds while still in the berry, put them in some of the "organic" (not sure what that means when you're talking a bag of dirt, but Whole Foods makes everything sound so shi-shi foo-foo good, so I went for it) soil in a couple pots and trays and have made sure the soil stayed moist, watering every one to two days. And miraculously, so far, they're actually growing.

The reason I'm growing fresh goji berries is that my "mornings" (I work graveyard, so morning comes in the p.m.) always start with a superfood shake. And some small portion of a high protein meal. And I'm telling you, this one thing alone has made a pretty dramatic difference in my mood and energy. I've been doing this for over a year now in various forms as I've experimented with it-- and much of what I do now is actually what I have learned from my boyfriend Jeremy who has self-educated himself on this stuff in incredible detail through various teachers, primarily David Wolfe.

And over the past year, I've found myself in difficult times, depressed, low on money, low on energy, low in inspiration... and then I drink my superfood shake. And I don't mean to sound like a snake oil salesman, but honestly, it's like I DRINK my way to positivity. It doesn't happen the first time you have the superfoods (though you might feel something), but as I spent days and weeks and months giving my body all these superfoods, I began to really look forward to it. It was like someone turned on the lights inside my cells and it just... made me lighter. Made me light up. Inside.

Sometimes, especially when a really heavy state confronts us, in the form of relationship trouble or money trouble or health trouble especially, it seems nearly impossible to find a thought that feels better. When I find myself in the grip of really hating where I am, or even just deeply dreading what horrifying situation MAY arise, the fear and anger and powerlessness and the myriad heavy states that arise feel like they're the only reality that is and that ever will be. An author I love, Stephen Levine, talks about how heavy states seem to scream that they are the ultimate and only truth. When in actuality, it is just what the present moment is carrying in with it like the tide. It will go back out again. But we don't believe that when it's happening. Which is why meditation is so crucial for me, but more on that later.

My long-winded point is that making this commitment to myself to enjoy these superfoods everyday is no longer a chore. It's something I look forward to. And if I miss it, I feel the difference. It is has made my skin clearer, it has given me more even and balanced energy levels, it has made me look and feel younger, it seems to have reversed a host of little health difficulties that had the potential to become bad conditions including a pre-diabetic condition to which I am genealogically predisposed among many others.

I put a whole bunch of amazing things in my morning shake and I do vary it, but I thought I would share what I use. I'd be curious to hear if anyone else reading this does something similar, has recommendations or stories and what your experience has been overall.

My one sort of disclaimer is that I have somewhat mixed feelings about raw cacao and there is mixed information out there. However, I believe so strongly in the law of attraction, and there is so much that is good about cacao, that I do ultimately believe that if you feel aligned with having massive amounts of cacao daily and really believe it's good for you, it probably will be good for you. I'm not aligned with having it all the time. It's a medicinal plant ultimately just as much or more than it is a superfood, but I'm going to let other folks battle that one out. Cacao's great. I just do my utmost to eat intuitively and I'm on the fence with cacao. Or as Abraham is always quoting at the art of allowing seminars "If it's not a hell yes, it's a hell no." I'm not exactly sure what a "Hell sometimes" means. Split vibration.

One sort of disclaimer with all of this is that it really does make an enormous difference to have the digestive system working right. It just makes it easier for the body to receive all these wonderful nutrients. I know people get funny about a little bowel talk, but I'll simply mention a couple things that have worked for me. Psyllium husk is great-- I get mine at Trader Joe's ("Secret of the Psyllium"). And Dr. Schulze's bowel cleanse program is very effective. His style of teaching can be more than a little off-putting, but his stuff works. And you DO need both the Intestinal formula #1 AND #2. He also has a newer product called "Bowel Shots" which I've used somewhat extensively already and one shot WILL clean you out. Dr. Schulze's site is and no, I don't get any money for writing this. It's just something that's worked for me.

Anyway, I wanted to share my shake concoction. Again, I'd love to hear other folks' experiences and I am happy to answer any questions to the best of my ability (or I'll enlist Jeremy's help to answer if I don't know) or simply point you to better teachers like David Wolfe.

Jeremy calls his concoction his Badass Cacao Shake. And I sort of like that. So I'm going to steal it....

Badass Superfood Shake (as concocted by Jeremy and I)
*Note: I am in no way associated with any of the companies or brands I'm mentioning and don't get anything from the companies for talking about what I use. I just genuinely love the stuff.*

- Navitas brand Goji powder (I strongly prefer the raw powder to the actual berries for the shake, believe it or not, because in the big picture, although you don't get the fat from the berries, you get about a pound worth of the nutrients in one tablespoon and we're adding good fat with some other oils and such), 1 tablespoon (I get this at Erewhon, this is Navitas' website:
- Navitas brand Acai powder 1 tablespoon (In L.A., I get mine at Erewhon Market)
- Either Navitas brand powdered Yacon or brand (david wolfe's website - Yacon syurp - 1 tablespoon (Navitas or
- Sun Warrior Brand Activated Barley - 1 tablespoon (
- Sun Warrior Brand Raw/Vegan Rice Protein (choose your flavor) - 1 scoop (about 2 tblspns) (
- (again, follow your own guidance on this) Ultimate brand cacao powder - 1-2 tablespoons depending on your taste and budget
- Noniland Noni (
- Ultimate brand Maca - 1-2 tablespoons, same as cacao
- Ultimate brand Himalayan Pink Salt - 1/4 teaspoon
- Navitas Brand Pomegranate Powder - 1 tblspn
- Ultimate brand cacao butter/oil - 1 tablespoon
- Coconut oil/butter - 1 tablespoon
- Dr. Schulze's Superfood - 2 tablespoons (
- Ocean's Alive Phytoplankton - 1 dropperful
- Y.S. Brand Bee Pollen/Propolis/Royal Jelly
- Ultimate Brand Chlorella/Spirulina - 20 "tablets"
- Really Raw Brand Honey - 1-2 tablespoons depending on taste
- Navitas Brand Raw Stevia - 1 tblspn
- Organic Blueberries (I get frozen ones at Trader Joe's) - 1/4 cup
- Navitas Brand Palm Sugar (raw "sugar" from coconuts- so good) - 1-2 tablespoons
- Brand of your choosing, I like Zico or straight from the young coconut (as with all of this obviously) 8-16 ounces coconut water

So, as funny as it is to say aloud, that is literally my recipe for a little piece of enlightenment. Just one of many ways to help the body feel better and thereby help everything feel better.

The law of attraction is a spiritual law for physical beings in a physical universe. And the bottom line of all this prattle is that this superfood stuff really make it easier for me to think a better feeling thought. In fact, sometimes I can skip right past the thought and go straight to the feeling good.

Finally, I know this is a little frenetic and all over the place. And I'm aware of the law of attraction "lingo." I think it's plain enough, but I've been a student of Abraham a long time now so it may be more opaque than I realize. For anyone who's lost and cares to understand, you can visit for more information.

And I'll leave you here with a video that encapsulates a lot of what I've referenced.

May it ease your ascent.

Be well.

No comments:

Post a Comment